There are so many parenting theories available that try and provide good parenting advice. Ultimately the goal is to be an effective and practical parent. I am going to give you some suggestions on how to become a more effective parent without all the theory – just getting down to the basics.
Focus on Solutions, Not Punishments
We have so many words for punishment and often we create new ones when the old ones start to be revealed as a veiled attempt to disguise the word punishment. The most popular word that avoids ‘punishment’ is consequences.
Consequences just means the end effect of our behavior. The consequence could be good or bad, but it is the result of our behavior. For years, there has been a real push on using logical consequences. Logical consequences are really just a way of saying punishments that make sense to the offense
A Better Way – Solutions instead of Punishments
To be an effective parent, you need to find out what works both for the short-term but more importantly, what is going to work for the long-term. That is where solutions-focused parenting is an extremely powerful and successful method of discipline.
What Does Solution-Focused Mean?
It is rather self-explanatory – you focus on finding solutions to the behaviors instead of punishing the child for their actions. For example, if a child is coloring on the table instead of a piece of paper. The logical consequence would often be to have them scrub the table and have to stop coloring. That isn’t all bad, but it doesn’t help the child do better next time.
Solution-Focused would have you working with the child on ways to make sure that they don’t make the same mistake again. Work on strategies that help be succeed, like placing newspaper on the table first, or making sure they are not coloring in front of the TV where they get easily distracted. Either way, the focus is on finding solutions to the behavior.
0 Response to "Parenting Discipline – Solution Focused, Not Punishment Focused"
Post a Comment