Parenting is a subject that drives intense emotion, raises important questions and is unique to each family. Parenting means different things to different people, but ultimately, parenting is a skill that needs to be learned and mastered. There are no set rules, no official handbooks, no how-to-raise-a-child kit that teaches tips of positive parenting skills. There are plenty of guidebooks, magazines and websites devoted to the subject of parenting, where a parent can turn for advice on tips of positive parenting skills.
As a mother of two, I've learned a few lessons of my own.
First, nobody is right all of the time.
Second, each child is unique and a parenting formula that works for one may not be right for another.
Third, you're allowed to make mistakes.
There are a few skills however, that are essential to parenting in a safe, effective and positive way. Here are a few of my tips of positive parenting skills.
FOCUS
In our busy world, there are plenty of distractions. Televisions, telephones, doorbells and the minutia of daily life. To parent a child requires focus. Pay attention to your child. Do you know where they are? Are you aware of their existence? Can you outline what happened to them that day?
It seems basic. By focusing on our children, we can address their needs, wants and assure their safety. If we concern ourselves with our children, we can discern the things that need to be done in order to effectively raise this child.
Distracted parenting is sadly, a major cause of death for children in the United States. Mothers leave infants in hot cars to suffocate, mothers and fathers forget to check the whereabouts of their children before backing out of driveways and parents lose track of children who go missing, wander into unsafe areas or are taken by strangers.
SELF CONTROL
Exhibiting self control in front of a child does two things. It shows a child by example how to govern their emotions and how to act accordingly. Second, it protects a child from potential abuse that results when explosive emotions drive a parent's actions. By learning to control your own behaviors, you will give your child the tools they need to ascend to a responsible adulthood.
GET INVOLVED
Parenting is a social behavior and the most important social interaction you can have is with your child. Get involved with their life, volunteer at their school, talk to them every day and know their friends. Do these things in a positive way, to show your child that you care. Teenagers, especially, may resent your intrusion but do not stop. Routinely tell them you love them and that your involvement is your parental responsibility.
These three tips of positive parenting skills do no more than cover the very basics of parenting. But, by developing these three core skills, you can adapt your unique parenting style to every child.
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