Bringing a child into the world itself is a great responsibility. Holding a newborn and nursing the child makes us feel overwhelmed. But parenting is an ongoing phase and a nourishing activity. This is bound by emotions, by actions and expectations. There are no formula methods or ready-to-apply skills to solve parenting problems, as each child is different. The moment we start parenting, our priorities change. Learning is one thing that remains constant and all of us learn from mistakes.
There are several mistakes we do as parents. Firstly, all of us expect our children to excel in academic and extra curricular performances. When we see our children failing or lagging behind we silently feel a tinge of sadness. What is achieved by our child's friend can not be compared with our own child. Each child has a different milestone and though they can not communicate, each child has varied interest levels. Channeling our own ambitions into the child's feats is a sign of bad parenting.
The most common problem faced by parents is that their child is often bursting into tantrums. This is another pointer at our own actions and behavior at home. Arguments often occur at homes, between elders or spouses but this is to be avoided in front of children. Often a happy child is a result of a happy environment. The emotional security of the child is not threatened and hence the child stays happy. Physical abuse traumatizes children and swearing should also be avoided in front of them.
Our personality has a direct bearing on our children. Expressing love is very important in a family. Children actually glow when they hear praises and this is encouraging for them. Constant bickering or name calling is a sign of bad parenting. Acknowledging faults and saying sorry is very healthy. Children understand when explained logically and pardon us quite easily.
Explaining to them about an abusive situation and promising them about security helps them erase phobias. Giving children choices in wearing party clothes or choosing the birthday dress is like empowering them. When you give them choices let them take a wholesome decision. Constantly hovering around them makes us a helicopter parent and this threatens their individuality.
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