Finding appropriate discipline for children who just cannot seem to behave themselves can be very hard to do. It is often difficult to distinguish the right discipline for the right child. Mainly because every child is different and so the disciplinary tactics are all over the place because of it. It is never easy playing the part of the disciplinarian but it is not only necessary its also vital to the development and future well being of the child.
So although you may not feel like it, you are doing what is best for your child. One of the first things that you will need to do is to ascertain what causes your child to misbehave. This is very important for many reasons but the most important reason is to determine accountability. If your child is accountable or not for the misbehavior plays a big part of how, or even if, you are going to discipline them.
For instance, how appropriate would discipline for children be if they are not responsible for their behavior? If that child cannot help the behavior it would not be appropriate at all. Or what if the reason behind the behavior is somewhat unclear? There are many cases where this tends to come up.
There is a difference between intention and unknowingly breaking the rules. However, one can only plead ignorance for so long. Everyone should get at least one warning. There are so many different scenarios that it is almost impossible to deal with fairly. Almost.
Discipline for children that misbehave accidentally should not be the same as discipline for children who purposefully and intentionally disobey you. This can be so tricky especially if there is more than one child in the house. What is appropriate for one child is certainly not for another and this does not make it any easier for you or the other children.
Discipline for children who are relatively good all the time can be very difficult to do too. When your aggressive child is watching and sees no action being taken it can really have an unwanted affect. This can cause even more trouble. The only way to avoid disputes is to explain them thoroughly in a way that they can all easily understand.
Yes, its completely understood that its much easier said than done but it can be done. Focusing all your energy on getting your difficult child to change behavior can sometimes have an adverse affect on your other children. They may resent the fact that you are spending so much time on them and so misbehave themselves as a plea for attention.
This is a relatively common dilemma. What is a parent to do in this situation? Should the discipline for children who misbehave all the time be the same for this child? Of course not, but you might have to do it this way to uphold the appearances of fairness. Explain it to your children as clearly as you would to anyone else. You may be surprised at the reaction.
Children are pretty amazing and will tend to understand things when we least expect them to. In the end you will have different parenting styles for different children and that is okay. There will need to be a basic plan that everyone in the house should be a part of making. Including the children even on creating the consequences will work out great.
Kids love being a part of their own parenting process and in many cases when creating consequences they tend to be harder than you would be. Try and explain to them that each of the consequences should be behavior specific and flexible in as much as is possible. Plus, the one lasting thing that is very important when it comes to discipline for children is; Parents have the final say.
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