It's amazing, how many parents, years ago, managed to successfully rear their children, without the help of 'parenting skills'- a concept completely alien until comparatively recently. There's no doubt whatsoever that the arrival of a new baby, with all its needs, can be overwhelming initially, turning a previously balanced and structured regime into one of chaos. There are some parents who find it almost impossible to cope, particularly if the mother is unlucky enough to suffer from post natal depression. Even a mother who is fit and healthy is sometimes frightened by the responsibility she bears for attending to the wants of a new baby. The mother quickly realises that this little scrap of humanity is totally dependent on her which can at times seem daunting.
However, with the number of books on baby care, plus clinics and medical facilities available, a new mother has help undreamed of only fifty years ago. In addition, she has numerous labour saving gadgets including washing machines, disposable nappies, bottle warmers etc. which all contribute to making her life easier than that experienced by her mother. But it appears all these advantages are not enough to enable mothers to bring up their children without lessons in 'parenting skills'. Incredible as it may sound, the basic ingredient required for bringing up children are two words, 'common sense'. It has to be admitted that it takes time to come to terms with the arrival of a new person in a household but it does not take rocket science to learn how to rear that new baby.
Common sense should provide enough guidance along with the informative books and medical help mentioned previously. Even people with no experience with babies can successfully bring up a child without lessons in 'parenting skills'. All these 'parenting skills' are after all, when examined, based on common sense. It does not take much imagination to know when a baby needs feeding, changing or is tired. It takes practice but soon becomes second nature. Some mothers feed 'on demand', others prefer a strict time-table. Obviously whichever system works is the one to adopt; there's certainly nothing mysterious or difficult about it. As the baby settles down, puts on weight and shows signs of growth, the easier things become. Some babies will always cry more than others which can be distressing for the parent but again, using common sense, mothers begin to recognise what's upsetting their baby and so take the necessary steps to deal with the problem. Then the baby begins to flourish and, at this stage, can bring tremendous happiness and joy to the parents as they watch their baby develop with its own personality. There is nothing more rewarding.
Quite frankly, most 'parenting skills' are innate, there to be used when called upon. All children need understanding and love, particularly love which most parents are only too happy to display. Always being there for their children is the most reassuring stand any parent can take. Obviously, as a child grows, it's important for him / her to discover there are right and wrong ways to behave and responsible parents will ensure their children learn these differences. Encouraging children to do well is fine as long as parents do not make the mistake of pushing their offspring into situations which make them unhappy. All children are naturally curious and this curiosity helps them to learn and should never be discouraged. Equally important, however, no parent should allow their children to be burdened with unrealistic expectations. Each child eventually finds his / her level of intelligence. Forcing a child to exceed that level can be exceedingly damaging to a child's development.
All the above points are simply based on common sense and, if used wisely, will almost always result in producing a child who is well-balanced, secure and able to cope with the trials and tribulations of growing up. This will also give huge pleasure and love in the process to his / her parents. Rocket Science? Not at all!
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